We’re in for a wild ride as Hellions begins with a debut issue by Zeb Wells, Stephen Segovia, David Curiel, and Cory Petit. The team comes together, with Psylocke as their parole officer and Sinister as the adult in the room. There is no way this could go poorly…
Liz Large: I honestly had no idea what to expect when I first saw this book– everything from the name, to the concept, to the character lineup seemed absolutely bonkers, but I have to say: what an amazing combination. What did you think, overall?
Austin Gorton: I too was not entirely sure what to expect – aside from the general hook of the series tackling the issue of how the more villainous/less “big picture” villains fit into this whole new Krakoan status quo. We’ll get into that more, but I was pleasantly surprised at the approach here. It unfolded almost like a legal argument with the Quiet Council scenes serving as the courtroom: here are the crimes of the accused, here’s our proposed sentence, etc. Also, it was really funny? Like, laugh-out-loud funny in several places, which is definitely not what I was expecting from the “Mr. Sinister’s team of murder mutants” book.
Best Of The Worst
LL: That’s such a good point– this book could be a real downer, but the scenes always have a little bit of humor, but it isn’t shying away from the darker aspects, either. As the opening scene lets us know, some of these events are taking place on the anniversary of the Mutant Massacre [Ed. note: Where Sinister’s Marauders massacred the Morlocks]
AG: As someone with perhaps an unhealthy love of X-Lore, I deeply appreciated the Mutant Massacre callbacks. But even more than a historical footnote, it put front and center the question of the series: for much of the X-Men’s history, more often than not, a lot of their villains were fellow mutants. So what happens now that those evil mutants are sharing drinks at the tiki bar with the heroes? Here, we see a group of Morlocks (hi again Beautiful Dreamer!) going after Scalphunter in retribution for the part he played in massacring them and their people. Sabretooth is already in the Pit of Exile; what about the rest of those killers? This issue doesn’t entirely answer that question, but it hangs a pretty large lampshade on it via its core cast of villainous characters.
LL: This issue opens with what I’d consider to be a fairly standard X-Men scene– a group of anti-mutant humans have gotten their hands on some weaponry, and the team (Havok, Nightcrawler, Syrin, Rockslide, and one Wolverine, as required) is going to stop them. We get reminded that this group of humans, calling themselves the Hellfire Cult, aren’t related to the Hellfire Trading Company [Ed. note: the group running the current, swashbuckling version of the Marauders]. Alex suggests that this group probably got this weaponry thanks to a more powerful patron– and Kurt seems to have an unnecessarily negative reaction. This surprised me, since Kurt knows very well how these sorts of organizations work. It could be nothing, but Alex seems to be on the outs with the others even before things get out of hand.
AG: I noticed that too – both that Nightcrawler seemed unnecessarily harsh towards Alex’s supposition, and that Alex seemed in a junior position to everyone else. At one point, Wolverine referred to him as “kid” and that seemed…wrong, for a character just one step removed from the original five X-Men, whom Wolverine fought side-by-side – and drank with – during the Outback years, and headed up both the government-sponsored iteration of X-Factor and the Avengers Unity squad.
Then, of course, there was his seeming-heel turn, when he savagely attacked the Hellfire Cultists, the act which landed him amongst the other “parolees” in the series’ cast. At first, I had to stop and think where Havok was left pre-HoXPox but clearly, his actions are meant to be one of the book’s mysteries going forward. [Ed. note: Havok got “un-inverted” during the Mothervine arc of X-Men Blue. He then led an unofficial team of mutants in Astonishing X-Men against the explicit wishes of Kitty Pryde. He joined Cyclops in Rosenberg’s Uncanny X-Men where, like most of the cast, he died.]
LL: I also want to give props to Cory Petit’s lettering here. I love when a character gets a unique font, and it does a really great job here of making Alex seem unhinged and scary. In every panel where he’s acting violently, he gets a creepy, messed up speech bubble, and (for me, at least), it seemed to give an impression that he’s truly not in control of his actions. And that’s the beauty of X-Men– there are so, so many options for what the problem could be. But the other X-Men don’t seem to notice this–and in their defense, they’re off-panel when he’s speaking like that–and it doesn’t get brought up when the Quiet Council meets.
Square Pegs In Round Holes (A Metaphor)
AG: It warms my Cyclops-loving heart to see him coming to his brother’s defense so vigorously, even staring down Magneto at one point. In terms of the council, what do you think about their decision regarding the soon-to-be Hellions? The idea that some mutants are made villains by their powers , and while they don’t deserve to be exiled, they also maybe aren’t fit to roam about Krakoa. Interesting story idea, too big a “get out of jail free card” for a jerk like Empath, or both?
LL: I’ve always thought Empath was the worst, but the data page went a long way on selling me on at least the concept behind this book. This issue gave me major “The Good Place” vibes, and I mean that as a compliment. Considering the situation mutants were in until the start of this most recent era of X-Men, it’s easy to believe that at least some of the worst of them might have turned out differently in a world where they had access to proper mental health services, a community that wasn’t trying to kill them, etc. But, at the same time– there are a lot of kids and defenseless people living on that island. There needs to be rules to protect them. And, like we saw in Cable last week– you can fight people responsibly on Krakoa, with their consent! What did you think about the intros of all our other Hellions?
AG: I will never not forget the time Empath almost made Tom Corsi & Sharon Friedlander sex themselves to death, but that data page did at least open the door to the idea that there’s a way to make the character work as something more than an unredeemable monster – and that’s good (for the series, at least).
As for the other characters, the whole flashback/vignette approach worked really well (I particularly liked the poetic chapter titles). We touched on the John Greycrow/Scalphunter one a bit already, as it addressed the elephant on the island, so to speak, of putting Marauders (the original kind) in the same community as the Morlocks. I don’t recall if this whole “when he’s off his meds, he’s feral” thing was previously established for Wild Child or not, but the character has largely been little-used in the X-Books, so it’s not really upsetting any apple carts to go with it here, and it’s clearly an approach meant to tie in with the larger concept of “villains by dint of their powers”. [Ed. note: Wild Child has largely been an Alpha Flight character but I ain’t read none of that so I can’t tell you if this fits into it or not.]
The strangest inclusions, from the announcement of the series and up through this issue, are Nanny and the Orphan Maker. I carry a torch for the Louise Simonson X-Factor, and those two characters were a recurring presence for a good chunk of it. I’m happy to see them again, but I’ve never really considered them violently out-of-control mutants. Nanny, in particular, was always presented as well-meaning, even if her methods were villainous [Ed. note: she just wanted to protect mutant children. By, er, murdering their parents so SHE could protect them]. I’m not entirely sure their scene sold me on their inclusion, but for now, I’m happy to have them along for the ride.
LL: Nanny’s character design is such a delight, I want her in the background of every crowd scene on Krakoa going forward– and the truly creepy lullaby she sang to Orphan Maker was a joy. It didn’t seem like they were doing anything besides being unsettling except fighting Beast. Is fighting Hank McCoy a crime? I’d disagree. One thing that did stand out to me is that when we cut from the character flashbacks to the council meeting, Storm is lecturing John for attacking a defenseless group of Morlocks–when on the previous page, they were rushing at him as a group. It’s possible she’s referencing the original Massacre, but it didn’t sound like it. Between this and the weird Alex situation, I’m wondering how much of this is a set-up. Except for Empath, who is as far as I can tell, still being his old Empath self.
AG: First of all, we agree on both the creepiness of that lullaby, and the necessity of fighting Hank McCoy on occasion. Secondly, the Storm bit read funny to me as well. This gets back to one of the ongoing…I’ll say critiques of the HoXPox era as a whole: at times, characters’ voices or small actions seem off, in a way in which it isn’t clear if the writer just doesn’t have a strong grasp of the character, or if it’s meant to indicate a plot point in some manner. You mentioned Kurt’s reaction to Alex’s hypothesis earlier, that’s one instance. Storm’s take on the John/Morlock encounter is another. It COULD be she’s referring to the earlier Massacre, or it COULD be a plot point. Or it COULD be that Wells just goofed. We won’t really know until we know, I guess.
LL: Completely agree. The Scott situation is similar– would his partner, two of his close friends, and his still-on-good-terms-ex all hide this from him, only for it to be a surprise at a meeting? [Ed. note: To be fair, the X-Men are notoriously bad at communication.] He really loses it in a way that would be predictable to the people who know him and his history with Sinister. I’m really hoping that there’s more layers going on here, and I think there will be. There’s no way that Sinister swoops in with this plan and there’s not at least another dozen things happening behind the scenes. This plan is going to be a fascinating story, and I’m excited–but oh boy, it’s a HORRIBLE idea. Nothing about this will go well, and I’m so excited.
AG: Totally agree! And the way Cyclops ropes in the final member of the cast – Kwannon, fresh [Ed. note: ?] off of Fallen Angels – to serve as a babysitter/field leader, suggests he, at least, is wise to Sinister’s game to at least some extent. Yet there’s just no way this is going to end well. But it should be fun watching it all fall apart!
Now Be A Dear And Walk Into Hell For Me
LL: I really enjoyed Sinister explaining their first mission: shutting down the Essex Home, where he ran his cloning/experiments, because now it’s redundant due to the Five–and also, he’s been informed that it’s an abomination. As a great bonus, the original team of Marauders are holed up there. I see no way in which this will be weird or awkward for John, who, as an added bonus, has already threatened Empath and physically fought Wild Child before they even get going. Poor Kwannon, this is the worst babysitting gig ever.
AG: In much the same way the mandate of this series, at least initially, is to tackle the question of hero/villain relations in the Krakoan World Order, I love that the team’s first mission also tackles another one of those “hey, what about…?” questions raised by the new status quo, by sending them out to shut down that OTHER operation which brought dead mutants back to life via cloning. I’m also really curious why John is on Krakoa but the other Marauders aren’t. It’s presented here as being something they’re choosing, but then, of course, we see that may not be the case…
LL: That’s a good point– I’d actually really like to see something about why someone like John would choose Krakoa. He doesn’t seem to have friends or family there, and unlike some other mutants, he can take care of himself. But that will have to wait, because we get to look in at the Essex House, and it’s not just the Marauders hiding there. Looks like we’re getting Madelyne immediately, and I am thrilled.
AG: I love Maddie! She’s easily in my top five favorite Claremont characters, and the Goblin Queen is just such a great, vampy villain. Hellions, Marauders, Mr. Sinister, Nanny & Orphan Maker, now Madelyne Pryor: this series is like the greatest hits of late 80s X-Men, and it’s only the first issue!
X-Traneous Thoughts
- The second data page (in which Wells-via-Psylocke) more or less lays out the mission statement for the series, and is surprisingly specific in outlining the circumstances that must be met for a Hellions mission to occur. It’ll be interesting to see if he can stick to this (finding scenarios, for example, where people won’t die but unrestrained carnage is acceptable is trying to thread a very small needle), especially considering how often, when a book launches with a specific purpose to set it apart, it usually fails to stick to it (think Liefeld-era X-Force, the book that was going to be the proactive mutant team, then…wasn’t).
- I’ve just realized that one of John’s first missions as a Marauder was hunting down and murdering Madelyne Pryor, so I’m truly delighted about this upcoming reunion.
- And, Nanny & Orphan Maker tried to kidnap Maddie’s son (the pre-Cable Cable), in the run-up to ”Inferno”.
- We all remember that Alex and Maddie had a brief fling, but so did her and Empath… Wild Child seems to be the only parolee going into this without a history with her. Maybe she’ll go easy on him?
- All you Marrow fans remember, surely, that her “death” at Storm’s hands in Uncanny X-Men #325 also occurred on the anniversary of the Mutant Massacre. So it’s been at least two years since that happened!
- Remember when it was revealed that Gambit & John palled around back in the day? If Wells is drawing on that to explain why John would go to Krakoa, I will buy him a virtual drink.
- Krakoan reads GOBLIN QUEEN
Austin Gorton also reviews older issues of X-Men for The Real Gentlemen of Leisure. His shoulder ornamentation, sadly, can be outdone.
Liz Large is a copywriter with a lot of opinions on mutants.
Austin Gorton also reviews older issues of X-Men at the Real Gentlemen of Leisure website, co-hosts the A Very Special episode podcast, and likes Star Wars. He lives outside Minneapolis, where sometimes, it is not cold. Follow him on Twitter @AustinGorton
Liz Large is a copywriter with a lot of opinions on mutants.
