Waylon Jones is missing, and Batman has discovered he has been taken to the black site outside of Gotham, Ark M. Batman must find his friend, but he faces a threat like he has never encountered. Enter: Absolute Bane. Absolute Batman #9 is written by Scott Snyder, drawn by Nick Dragotta, colored by Frank Martin and lettered by Clayton Cowles.
Will Nevin: Apparently, some other fella bogarted our review of Absolute Batman #8. I’m not mad about it, but I think maybe I liked it a bit more than the last couple of issues? Like, I started to sync with the camp themes in this book? Or maybe I was having a good time at the gym when I read it. Who’s to say, really.
Side note, thanks to the gym’s relatively small yet incredibly loud soundtrack, I’ve got a Jonas Brothers song stuck in my head. Where’s a drill when you need one?
Matt Lazorwitz: Oof, that is rough. It’s been a month since I read issue #8, but I remember enjoying it. Marcos Martin was a good fit to take over for those couple issues, Absolute Freeze was creepy, and we got Batman vs. the White Walkers from Game of Thrones, sorta, which is a first, I think. Only problem: There’s no way the Bruce Wayne of this world could ever impersonate that Matches Malone. It would take, what, four Matches to equal the body mass of one Bruce Wayne?
Will: Turns out the Northern Lights don’t impress me much. Guess I’m just a fool for the human touch. I could be down, but you love me to Heaven.
Were you saying something? MAKE IT STOP.
Oh, right. Yes. I think it helps when Matches is only known to the Crime Alley gang and is a fungible goon anywhere else.
Assault on Ark M
Matt: Let’s start with the elephant in the room: Absolute Bane is the size of a GD elephant. I guess when Bruce Wayne is a giant, Bane has to be giant-er. I appreciate that Snyder is keeping the core of the character. Bane is not a mindless goon.
Will: That was the thought I had as well. If Bane is going to have the same gimmick (unlike Mr. Freeze who had his … inverted? flipped?), then he has to be bigger than the biggest Batman ever conceived. And if you’re going to do that, you need to lean super fuckin’ hard back into the core strategist that he once was. Of all the things Snyder has done in this book, this presentation of Bane was probably the safest — but also most logical if, again, he’s going to keep the same gimmick.
Also, I see what you did there. Got damn, Bane is big, especially in his Super Shredder form.
Matt: I picture him having this very small voice, since his head is so small in proportion to his body. Like David Hyde Pierce timbre, with the appropriate accent, talking about history.
I am definitely curious whether he is a mercenary or a product of the Ark Project that JK Industries is behind. And the hints that the Arks have been slowly created since the ’30s makes me more sure of my previous supposition that we are on a collision course between Joker and Ra’s: We can’t have these two long-lived corporate villains if they’re not going to cross paths, right?
Will: If I remember the stray bits of Snyder interviews and tweets I’ve internalized, we’re getting more Joker before we get Ra’s, but I want to see what Absolute Ra’s thinks of this Batman. He’s certainly no detective.
Matt: Have we talked about Absolute Ra’s? He’s the big bad over in Absolute Superman, running Lazarus Corp.
Will: We might have mentioned it? I know I at least caught spoilers as such. How is he different than the Ra’s we know? (Since I’ve only read Absolute Superman #1.)
Matt: He’s pretty much Ra’s as we know him. He hasn’t appeared much yet; the most recent issue has the most we’ve seen of him. And he seems to be building this mega-corp just to bring about the destruction of much of humanity to save the planet, which is a standard Ra’s al Ghul plot. This new arc is called “Superman: Son of the Demon,” so it seems Ra’s has his eyes set on a different hero in this world, but we’ll see.
Will: That’s a fun concept — who needs the pit to run an everlasting empire when the sun makes you functionally immortal? Also, did you take that flashback to be a possible source of how Bruce is funding all of this?
Matt: I think that is a fair assessment. We have yet to see Selina in the present, and while if she was dead I think we would have heard something, I think she must have had some falling out with Bruce and the others. Could this money be the thing that drove that wedge between them? And I’m sorry, but having sex in a bed full of money is just asking for some kind of infection.
Will: Of all the things that can disrupt … certain human genital ecosystems … money is one I’d worry less about. And that could have been straight from the Mint! Nice, crisp and clean. In the prime universe, we talk a lot about Chekhov’s Two-Face, the idea that whenever we as readers are presented with a babyface Harvey Dent we know it’s only a matter of time before he turns. In the Absolute universe, there’s a ticking clock on all of these guys. I’ve made peace with what we’re doing here. All I ask is that we spread out the individual stories of everyone breaking bad over the next 60 issues or so. Waylon is up first, clearly. And god help us whatever gruesome version of Killer Croc we’re going to get. But let’s slowly ramp up to the next Crime Alley gang member to turn.
Matt: My money would be on Oswald being the next one to turn. He seems to be the one taking this whole Batman thing the worst.
It was nice to spend a little more time getting to know the Barbara Gordon of this world. She’s still a pretty thin character, taking the place of her father as Batman’s contact within the GCPD, but I was glad to see more of her, plus more Jim and Martha.
This book has a pretty sprawling cast, actually, and it only looks like it’s getting bigger. I’m a little worried we’re running into the Elseworlds problem of rushing out too many characters. I think I picked up two (maybe three) characters being established in one panel in this issue, plus the focus on Bane. Did you see any of them (well, aside from the obvious nametag)?
Will: You’d be surprised how difficult it is to read a nametag when your head is bobbing up and down like a fishing lure. Why don’t they make comics that are easily read on a treadmill, Matt? (I swear to god, you better not tell me to read in panel mode.) What’s your theory on the other characters aside from intrepid EMT D. Grayson?
Matt: The frozen skeleton is obviously a tease of Man-Bat, but I’m not sure if that is a tease of Ark M having created a Man-Bat or there being some kind of creepy ancient man/bat hybrid they discovered that they are now going to use as a model for their hybridization. I’m expecting a Dr. Langstrom to show up soon.
And eyepatch man in the photo with Alfred? That’s got to be Absolute Deathstroke, right? Some old colleague who went into the private sector and is now an assassin.
Will: I’ll buy that for a dollar. I know we tend to be hard on narration, but I thought the Alfred stuff here was great. This is a Pennyworth who has been through some shit.
Matt: And one who doesn’t seem to completely trust Bruce yet. He is holding back a lot of secrets, including ones about Bane, that might have helped Bruce in his infiltration. I can understand starting here, but as opposed to slow-rolling the Crime Alley gang (which I agree with), I hope Alfred and Bruce really start connecting in the next arc or so. There can only be so many times Alfred can send Bruce into combat under-informed before Bruce stops trusting him entirely.
Will: I like Alfred having his own arc — even as we lamented its sameness in the first chapter of this series — but I agree: For the sake of the overall story, it’s time for him to get on board 100%.
Matt: All in all, I like where this issue is going. I hope that we focus on Bane throughout this arc, and keep Joker in the shadows for at least one more arc. And as you said, with how monstrous everyone in this book is, Absolute Croc is going to be a sight to behold.
Will: Recalibrating my personal expectations has done wonders, Matt.
You can’t put a price on the human touch.
(make it stop)
Bat-miscellany
- It’s Pride Month, so this week’s BatChat podcast features three comics with the queer members of the Bat universe: Greg Rucka’s final arc featuring Batwoman, a HarlIvy wedding in the Injustice universe and a DC Pride special with a story by the one true voice of Batman, Kevin Conroy.
Buy Absolute Batman #9 here. (Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate, ComicsXF may earn from qualifying purchases.)
Matt Lazorwitz read his first comic at the age of 5. It was Who's Who in the DC Universe #2, featuring characters whose names begin with B, which explains so much about his Batman obsession. He writes about comics he loves, and co-hosts the podcasts BatChat with Matt & Will and The ComicsXF Interview Podcast.
Will Nevin loves bourbon and AP style and gets paid to teach one of those things. He is on Twitter far too often.
