Charlie Davis: Well last week we all kinda struck out, I was sick, Forrest was recovering, everyone was just kinda BLEH. So we decided to take a skip week which means we can come into wrestling this week with bright eyes and bushy tails… IF you can make it past Monday Night Raw!
Forrest Hollingsworth: I am fully vaccinated and stronger and faster than ever. Here, CD, try to hit me with one of these kendo sticks — you canāt.
Mikey Zee: Forrest has ascended. I hear they have Tye Dillingerās phone number now, and dialing it summons him out of the Gimmick Graveyard. (The number has a lot of 10s in it.)
Rob Secundus: Soon Shoot Sundays will be fully vaxed and then nothing can stop us!
Sunday: IMPACT! Rebellion
CD: Okay so, I wasnāt going to watch Rebellion. In fact, I have pretty much made it a running gag in these columns that I miss IMPACT on the regular even though one of my favorite wrestlers has been making frequent appearances. Itās nothing against Impact, itās simply that I need one night off from thinking about wrestling, especially because we have something on basically every night of the week now. That said, everyone else was actually super looking forward to it and I wasnāt sure how I could say no to watching Kenny Omega in a big match become Kenny-Three-Belts.
So I watched and I had a good time! I usually watch WWE PPVs because they feel super low stakes, and this was another one that I could just plug in and enjoy. All the matches were solid, and then the main event… Kenny Omega in a big match, one that Mauro Ranallo was calling even, was REALLY great. Iāve seen lots of Kenny matches at this point and while I donāt think this is anywhere close to as good as he can get, it was a great performance and one for the ages as he walked away with the unified IMPACT World Championship. For a moment, as Kenny stood in the ring with the belts after giving an incredible match, I entirely forgot that he was the bad guy. I was so happy for him. If I am honest, I am still just happy for him. Take all the belts Kenny, I will watch the world burn with you.
RS: I made the final match for this one, and while I agree with you Charlie, I canāt help but feel a bit disappointed by the ongoing IMPACT crossoverā because IMPACT gets buck wild in a way that AEW doesnāt, and so above all else I want IMPACT to be an opportunity for my favorite AEW performers to get a bit wild. Maybe they get shot and someone has to solve a murder mystery. Maybe they go to literal hell to find a soul of their lost friend. Maybe they do a Final Deletion. But when AEW folks show up to IMPACT, itās just, well, pretty good matches. Nothing too out there.
And in general, the ethos for AEW over the past year has often been getting less out there. Matt Hardy arrived at AEW by literally teleporting around a stadium. In the stadium stampede match, he transformed into multiple characters via the Lake of Reincarnationās waters. Now he is a guy with a lot of money. Abadon went from a zombie to, according to commentary, someone who lives a āzombie lifestyle,ā whatever that means. Kris Statlander came back and she still boops people on the nose, she still has alien stuff going on, but she mostly just talks like a normal person (and not all of these are badā Kris Statlander, I think, has been wonderful on the mic, for example). Itās just that I wish we had more stuff like the Stadium Stampede, one of my favorite matches of all time. If AEW is now, thanks to too many Cornette freaks spamming their replies on twitter with āthis isnāt SPORTS BASED entertainment!!!,ā afraid to get wildā well, I wish they at least got a little wild on IMPACT.
FH: There was a lot of pedantic discussion online after this about what exactly IMPACT gains from their partnership with AEW at this point — especially because Kenny is almost certainly going to appear more on Dynamite than he does IMPACT. I think the rebuttal to that is, well, that even talking about what IMPACT gets from the agreement is already more talking about IMPACT than most people have done for a long time.
MZ: Exactly, Forrest. Not only did Kenny put on what in my eyes was an incredible match, he made Rich Swann look even more like a star than he is doing it. Thatās not to say Rich is bad at wrestling! But I find that IMPACT tends to struggle on the storytelling side of the equation. By hyping this match up, and then following through with the big match feel, both competitors were elevated in the ring. Itās a much different vibe than Kennyās NJPW matches, but for me itās still a match I can easily recommend for fans of great wrestling.
Aside from the main event, I have to give credit where itās due: IMPACT has some of the best women wrestling in the western side of the industry today, full stop. Their āKnockouts Divisionā put on both an amazing tag team match (FireānāFLAVA were ROBBED, OKAY?!), and a great Knockouts Championship match, with both of those belts changing hands. The tag match between reigning and retaining champs FinnJuice (also a crossover, from NJPW) and the Good Brothers where the Good Brothers just could not get their shit together was pretty fun as well.
All this being saidā¦ I do agree with Rob that IMPACT is lacking someā¦ essential spark. While the breezy transitions between matches and segments due to a lack of crowds is a relief when compared to the tortured ad copy of a WWE PPV, the very bare-bones production style IMPACT seems to favor doesn’t do the actual product any favors. Even commissioning a sound engineer to give them some more musical stingers to work with would do them wonders in my opinion, give them a little more personality than the same two clips that they use in every episode and every PPV.
PS: I would be remiss if I let this section conclude without mentioning the amazing Kenny Omega, Belt Collector memes that the main eventās finish spawned:
Monday: Monday Night Raw, Thatās J-PW!, AEW Promos
CD: I watch so many people who love wrestling get angry about how BAD Raw is on a weekly basis. And I will agree that it is infuriating, but man I think we might have to accept that this is just gonna be the way it is until something happens to shake up WWE programming in a big way. I donāt know what that is, but something needs to happen, and clearly an outcry from the fans isnāt it. I donāt know if things will change when we have regular crowds again, if they will actually permit the show to keep being the endless loop of the same match ups over and over again with DQ finishes and no starts to feuds or rehashing of previous ones, but a manās gotta hope. There is far too much talent on this roster to let this show be THIS.
FH: Almost makes you want to throw tomatoes or something.
RS: Of all things RAW, Iām most curious about what you folks think of Charlotteās return and Rheaās championship reign thus far?
CD: I think the turn of Charlotteās character could be something really good! Sadly, they seem to not know how to book the rest of the division and maybe even sadder, they kinda seem hellbent on sucking away Rheaās personality by having her give robotic promos. I just. I want more of the talent on Raw. Especially the women.
FH: Charlie, youāre right that the main problem right now is that Raw feels like the same show every week and I think it will be especially difficult for Rhea to grow or seize the moment in that kind of environment (again, sheās being rewarded for her potential but itās not potential she has a full grasp on). That being said, there was some iteration this week that I found refreshing!
Sonya Devilleās backstage role hasnāt been necessarily bad, but it has been lacking a personal direction — the audience knowing here as previously in-ring talent — in a way that Adam Pearce isnāt beholden to. Her booking of ex-best-friend Mandy Rose in what she knows will be a squash with Charlotte is something, and a little more reliant on continuity than WWE normally likes to be.
Reservations about Riddle aside, I also enjoy the RKBro direction for Randy Orton. Both are competent in-ring performers, and the little bit of levity that Riddle adds does a lot for Randy who went from super serious feud with Edge to super serious feud with Drew McIntyre to super serious feud with The Fiend without much breathing room. That they resisted the urge to turn Randy against Riddle is all the better, too!
MZ: Even The New Day throwing tomatoes isnāt enough to save it for me; this Mikey is outie on RAW. I did take a break from wrestling this Monday, but next week, itās Tokyo Joshi Pro Wrestlingās Thatās J-PW for me! I havenāt talked about this here before, but Iāve been trying to get more into joshi wrestling for a while now. I try to follow the events along via gifs and fan-run English update accounts on Twitter, as the time zone difference has always gotten in the way of me actually remembering to watch a whole event. However, a short 15-30 minutes of wrestling (with English commentary, no less!) every week is something thatās a good amount for me, especially on a Monday. Excited to talk about that next week, and feel free to watch along with me!
Rob mentioned Kris Statlanderās slightly revised gimmick earlierā¦ I definitely think she reads as alien to me (maybe even more alien than before, with the addition of the green facepaint) but her motivations and awkwardness on Earth are amplified and crystallized through her joining the Best Friends (formerly composed of Chuck Taylor, Trent?, and Orange Cassidy). They put out an amazing, hilarious promo on Monday that is framed as the boys trying to teach the alien how to give a promo andā¦ well, if you havenāt seen it, just watch it.
Tuesday: NXT, NXT Controversy
FH: I have some mixed thoughts on NXT this week!
First, I have to compliment Cameron Grimes. I have detested his weird, scummy Antiques Roadshow character for months mostly because I felt it lacked dedication. This new iteration though, predicated on a feud with The Million Dollar Man Ted Debiase, works. Cameron has finally ratcheted the character work up in a way that makes him enjoyably horrible and not meandering — what I said about Kenny Omega willing to be a bad person weeks ago applies here albeit on a smaller scale.
A lot of wrestling is, naturally, predicated on the willingness to suspend your disbelief, but that should be relegated to in-ring work. When a performer believes in their character so the audience can too is when they really start to succeed, and when it makes it easier to forgive in-ring missteps, bad booking, whatever it may be. Grimes feels like heās finally grasped that in the catalyst of solo vignettes, and Iām excited to see where they go with him from here.
MZ: Agreed, last weekās stuff combined with this weekās segment really made the character work for me. It was justā¦ pure, outrageous comedy in the best way, really digging into the character. I wasnāt sure about him before, but this direction just feels so naturally unnatural in an almost Twin Peaks-esque way.
FH: Unfortunately, I feel like theyāre missing that same point with Toni Storm. Toni is a fantastic wrestler, one of my favorite women on the NXT roster, but since her re-debut from NXT UK, sheās been lacking any genuine direction. They have treated her, especially in this new feud with Zoey Stark (and Zayda Ramier), like a veteran, and capable of wrestling at that calibre, but does the less familiar audience know that? Do they know who Toni is? Do we see an active explanation or reason as to why she should be able to take the pins from new talent and still feel protected? Iām not sure, mostly because the crossover between NXT and UK viewership is not 100/100, and Iām not sure theyāre interested in giving her the space to explain why in or out of the ring.
It in effect makes the UK talent feel lesser, like her accomplishments there made her good, but not good enough for āmainā NXT as she takes loss after loss. I find that disappointing — a stark contrast to what they can do with new characters like Grimes.
CD: I think The Way is probably my favorite thing on NXT at the moment. It pulls so many elements in from things I already like, which is basically comedy heels cemented in by sheer talent and a family-like camaraderie. Vishal isnāt here to tell me there has only ever been one group like this, so I feel as if Iām already winning.
MZ: I loved the callback (intentional or otherwise) to Candice LeRaeās old catchphrase when she smashed a box of cupcakes in Ember Moonās face. Iām super-excited for the Street Fight between the tag teams of Candice and Indi vs Shotzi and Ember next week; I anticipate it being a lot of fun and the whole storyline has been the highlight of my NXT watching as of the Tuesday move.
CD: Other than that, things were pretty solid this week. Adam Cole had an interview where he was dressed in an all-black suit out by a pool and complained that it was too hot. Heās a perfect asshole and I love him. He also said Kyle would never be on top of NXT as long as he was there. Cut to Kyle looking at the interview from a darkened room. Could this be leading to some sort of āloser leaves NXTā match? Also no one seemed overly concerned that Roddy just QUIT? IDK man. Love some of this stuff, but the long-term direction hasnāt revealed itself for me.
FH: We would also be doing a disservice to discuss NXT without discussing their actively growing political and perception problems. Notably, current referee and former talent relations employee Drake Wuertz, who this week phoned into a Seminole County Commissioners meeting to spread dangerous, Qanon-backed, conspiracy rhetoric about COVID mask mandates and child trafficking. Wuertzās outburst, linked below, is merely the figurehead for a much larger issue among NXTās roster that has long gone unaddressed.
Itās hard to deny that NXTās protection of dangerous people is not becoming a tangible part of their product as they have refused to fire Jordan Devlin, Velveteen Dream and others, and have Karrion Kross — apparently a Q-supporting anti-vaxxer — as their champion. Be it for the safety of their talent and audience, or simply because they are becoming increasingly unmarketable, something needs to change.
Wednesday: AEW Dynamite
CD: Iāve been given lots of delicious juice to drink recently. Ever since The Young Bucks officially turned heel, I feel like Dynamite has just been a little bit of a different show to watch. The run up to that happening was highly compelling and emotional TV, but I was pulled so thin emotionally watching Don berate Matt and Nick try and back his brother up while he was also slowly crumbling inside that maybe it was a little harder to enjoy than usual. Now, even though we all know literally everyone but the Good Brothers and Don (who I am convinced is perhaps some ancient warlock) is feeling some sort of way inside about all thisā¦ things feel right for the first time in a long time.
Kenny, fresh off winning the IMPACT title and becoming Kenny-Three-Belts gave a pretty great promo in a limo this week, topped by a bit of perfect comedy of Nak accidentally honking the horn causing everyone to scream considering what happened to the trailer last week. This finally feels like The Eliteās time again and I am very happy about that. Oh and the rest of the show was pretty good too. Dynamite is on more than itās off, and itās rarely off. The only thing that made me frown a lot was Hangman getting so roughed up by Brian Cage. I understand the reasoning of it, but what can a cowboy do? How far exactly is he gonna fall before he realizes he traded one compancency in for another? I canāt wait for him to reach real self actualization.
Oh heck, and the Forbidden Door gets some action in a couple of weeks too! Mox v Nagata on AEW TV for the IWGP US Belt. Love this.
RS: Kris Statlander vs Penelope Ford. My god. Penelopeās hair, first of all, was absurd, and I loved it. But second of allā what a fantastic match. Iām so glad that the womenās division is finally getting multiple storylines, and that theyāre interacting with menās storylines, that there are now multiple intergender factions, and that above all else such incredible performers as Statlander and Ford get time in the spotlight.
FH: Christian is going to get Taz to come out of retirement and fight him himself and I support him.
MZ: Oh, gosh. There was so much to love for me in this episode, even if I did scoot past the under-baked āinnerā bit as per usual. Eddie essentially throwing his match with Michael Nakazawa after Kenny replaced him was PEAK āwhoās on firstā-style comedy and had me howling. Not only that, but it was a great character bit as well, going to show exactly the lengths Kenny will go to in order to maintain his increasingly-fragile dominance in AEW. Heās got too many plates spinning, but unlike his last outing as the leader of a faction, heās got People to manage the little particulars and keep everyone in lineā¦ which is a fun wrinkle to add on this iteration of the storyline.
The Statlander vs Ford match SLAPPED and was a great way for Kris to get her revenge on Penelope after her return. As I mentioned earlier, Kris put out a really cool promo for this. I also loved the spot where she looked out to Orange Cassidy for approval and his patented thumbs up! I love seeing her learn how to have friends and that she doesnāt have to be alone in the ring. Call me a simple man to please, but itās easily one of my favorite tropes.
Similarly incredible for me was Orange Cassidy v Penta El Cero Miedo match, and honestly, this might have been my match of the week. I love Alex Abrahantesā earnest nerdiness as Pentaās groupie and translator, trying to be just as threatening as the man he follows. And is there any style of wrestling Penta canāt do? I think not. He showed he had impeccable comedic timing in this match, which I already kind of suspected given how many incredible meme images have come from him and his faces. Also, the spot with the arm-breakerā¦ ah, chefās kiss. Cody who?
Thursday: IMPACT!
CD: IMPACT is on Thursday. I uh, didnāt watch it. Thankfully someone did! Weirdly enough though, to echo your point above, Forrest. Itās been declared that Kenny must show up on every episode of IMPACT or he will be stripped of the title. Interesting complications afoot.
FH: Thereās a very funny story to be told in IMPACT and Kenny/Don trying to one up or outthink each other given the malleability of wrestling rules, especially at IMPACT (now on Thursday nights!)
MZ: I did watch IMPACT, so I can shed a little bit of light on this! After a frankly slammin video package summarizing the events of Rebellion, we cut to dissension in the ranks outside the offices of Co-Executive VP Scott DāAmore. The locker room has gathered and everyone is out for Kenny Omegaās bloodā¦ but heās nowhere to be found. Don Callis comes out of Scottās office after everyone leaves for the show, fiddling with his phone distractedlyā¦ yāknow, to Zoom Kenny in for a celebration. Itās the way of the future!
Except, as Scott says, the ācontract was very clearā: Kenny has to appear at IMPACT in person. If he doesnāt, not only will he be stripped of the belt, but heāll be indefinitely suspended from AEW as well. But the āInvisible Handā can make that happen on short notice, right? Pull some strings, take care of it, or Kennyās out.
Itās a fun wrinkle in Donās story as Kennyās controlling manager and the secret force behind so many things. Scott Dāamoreās on-screen character never really worked for me since Iāve been watching IMPACT off and on, but this worked for me. All Don cares about is his bigger picture, while Scott still has a company to run, and he has to play by the rules that Don made him negotiate AND he still needs to hold his people together. So he brings none other than Chris Bey back for a #1 Contender match. Chris Bey is easily my favorite man on IMPACTās roster; heās great in the ring, super-handsome, and has the charisma of a Hollywood star. It was a great return, and Iām glad to see him win even if he did use the ropes to pin his opponent. If nothing else, it shows that Bey is maybe the man to beat Kenny at his own underhanded gameā¦?
The other fun wrinkle was twice during each match, theyād give us an update on the whereabouts of Kenny Omega. Don was constantly taking panicked calls from Kenny, whose private jet voyage didnāt go as smoothly as planned, and his goons, who he sent out to bring Kenny back. With only five minutes left in IMPACT, Kenny Omega and the Good Brothers ran in and, uh, asserted their dominance in their typical fashion.
Even though I have the same production quibbles with the weekly product as I do with the PPV, I will admit that I can see that IMPACT isnāt far away from cohering into something that is on par with NXT or old WWE storytelling as far as coherence and watchability. They did get a new intro video and branding, and I honestly hope that continues into the music and transition cues I mentioned earlier. It would also probably help to clean up their reputation and their policy on hiring abusers and other harmful people. Thereās a lot of great talent on the IMPACT! roster, and they deserve a show they can be proud of.
Especially because IMPACT is getting yet another NJPW crossover with Bullet Clubās El Phantasmo next week! Given Kenny and the Good Brothers have been calling themselves the Bullet Club, that should uh, definitely be interesting.
Friday: SmackDown, NJPW Strong
CD: SmackDown has been the A show since it moved over to Fox. That shouldnāt be a surprise, but I think the really obvious fact that the disparity between Raw and SmackDown is so great is one. Romanās reign, no pun intended, hasnāt really been working for me. Iāve been trying to dig in my guts to find out why, but I think it really just boils down to me not liking the fact that I know the outcome of every match until someone they deem worthy comes along. I think Iāve got smark disease. I also think that this whole Roman and Dbry thing where Dbry has to leave SmackDown if he loses should have been a PPV match. I do hope Cesaro really gets to shine in the upcoming feud with Roman though. Thatās all Iām really pulling for.
Oh! And in other news, Roman finally got a new theme! They really need a new person to compose their music because it’s super generic! I do like Aleisterās new vignettes tho, I hope it leads to something I can appreciate.
FH: Weāve had this push and pull for a while, CD, but I would argue that Romanās domination, and the straightforwardness of it, is a pattern that is good for the rest of the roster. Itās easier to create legitimate babyfaces if they exist in opposition to something, and Roman has become very good at being that something. Be it Cesaro, Big E, someone else, I think weāve spent enough time with this new Roman Reigns now to feel both legitimately surprised and satisfied when someone fully upsets him. I would like the theme more if Jimmy and Jey Uso were doing DMX-like barks on it or something.
I do see your point about the caliber of the Bryan, match, though and as a SmackDown specific thing it kind of makes me wish for a return to brand specific PPVs when the story warrants it — WrestleMania Backlash is weird, at best an obvious marketing grab to sweeten the new Peacock deal.
As a final note, Bianca Belair is a star. I canāt believe how much I love everything she does. SmackDown would probably do best to just stay out of her way, honestly.
And a final word as the resident NJPW Strong Scholar here: This weekās show was by no means as good as Strong has been lately, and itās a weird decision to not feature your new champion (Tom Lawlor) as much as possible, but it was still very watchable as the āDojo Showcaseā it was!
Iām excited about the prospects of Wheeler Yuta joining the roster, and while Iām eagerly anticipating Chris Dickinsonās challenge to Lawlor, the detour into a tag match with Mox, Nagata, and Narita next week is just about the best possible outcome in the meantime. Strong has a consistently high ceiling for in-ring performance for a show I feel few people talk about, and the storytelling has reached a high recently, too. It seems like theyāre really trying at something and I for one am incredibly interested.
MZ: Goodness, this match is gonna SLAP. I canāt wait. Narita is a young rising star and Iām excited to see tagging with the vet Nagata again!
Charlie Davis is the worldās premier Shatterstarologist, writer and co-host of The Match Club.
Forrest is an experimental AI that writes and podcasts about comic books and wrestling coming to your area soon.
Mikey is a writer, graphic artist, and tabletop roleplaying designer based out of Columbus, Ohio. In his free time, he watches wrestling and indulges in horror media. Find him on Twitter @quantumdotdot.
Robert Secundus is an amateur-angelologist-for-hire.
