Created by Otto Binder and Al Plastino at the end of the 1950s, the Legion of Super-Heroes were initially a set of powered 30th century teens who traveled back in time to recruit Superboy. As the Silver Age became the Bronze Age, the Legion added members, allies, enemies, a clubhouse and other bits of worldbuilding, gradually ramping up from the self-contained stories of science fiction veteran Edmond Hamilton into the sleek futurism and long character arcs of Paul Levitz and Keith Giffen in the early 1980s before exploding into a complex set of reboots, threeboots, wading boots, Waid-ing boots and experiences of getting the boot from frustrated DC editors. Legion rivals and backups included the Legion of Substitute Heroes, formed from rejects of the original team, and the set of villains dubbed the Fatal Five.
The Legion is a notoriously tough assignment for artists, because it has so many characters (and therefore so many crowd scenes). It’s also a tough nut for new fans to crack, because it has so many characters. So many, in fact, that some of them have gotten thoroughly lost– in never-reprinted issues, in backup stories, and in pockets of the 30th century that have been stolen by the Time Trapper and never seen again.
One such set of characters is the Legion of Palindromic Heroes. Introduced for issue 121 and seen briefly thereafter in the original title’s numbers 232, 343 and 989, these figures might as well be coming as going, and can’t be fully separated from their villainous opposite numbers: some of us would like to see them again.
DIKDIK KID KID. This Legionnaire has a typical LoSH backstory: the original Silver Age team included an antelope themed hero called Dikdik Kid, who had sharp horns, a running speed second to none, and the ability to digest grass. When he was killed by the vegan fanatic Lady Dal and her sidekick Bird Rib, he passed his mantle to a nearby civilian teenager, who assumed not the powers of a dikdik, but the powers of the Dikdik Kid, making him the Dikdik Kid Kid. He strives to honor his precursor’s ungulate legacy.
DAL LAD. This hungry hero gained his powers in a nuclear fusion cuisine accident. He’s able to fill almost any space with cooked lentils, and can fire wet lenticular beams from his head and hands. Sometimes he’s yellow. Sometimes he’s tasty and red.
YOB BOY. A very British take on the 30th century, this rough one’s always spoiling for a fistfight. Sometimes represented with a phonetic Cockney accent, he’s a big fan of Oasis and Brexit and can easily knock you into the 32nd century if you look at him wrong.
MISS SIM. She simulates things. Or does she???
LAG GAL. Other heroes try to get ahead of things, with superspeed or prediction or fighting skills that include anticipation. Lag Gal instead remains a few seconds behind everybody else, stuck in the recent past. She’s surprisingly hard to hurt, since opponents are always trying to strike at where she won’t be yet, and her sense of history allows her to solve cold cases, track clues for tough crimes, and further complicate the DC Universe’s seemingly never-ending series of retcons. Just don’t ask her to show up on time.
GIRL RIG. A technological heroine from 30th century Riga, she can hotwire, rebuild or jury-rig anything. The one hero you’d want on your side when the airlock fails and your space suit blows a fuse.
Girl Rig’s actual rig has been variously represented over the decades: usually “rig” has meant assistive mobility tech, though in one reboot she had a monster truck. In a beloved but never reprinted backup tale from LoSH 282, first-time visitors from the 20th century tell her she’s brave and courageous and a good example for us all, and she punches their lights out.
LEG-EL. Nothing to do with Lag Gal, and rarely seen on away teams, Leg-El is semi-secretly the most powerful of Kryptonian refugees. From his office near the top of Legion HQ, using nothing but his electronic signature, Leg-El can cancel, rewrite, or overwrite almost any change in the Legion’s reality. During the Threeboot era he was rumored to have a connection to Praeter Lemnos, the truly scary villain (or antihero) who could make anyone forget anything and scrap any plan. His most consistent antagonist in other Legion eras, however, has been the confrontational, shapeshifting, fourth-wall-breaking Durlan known as Sue-Us.
NOTATON. Not to be confused with nation, narration or notation, she can lift, telekinetically manipulate, and throw anything that weighs less than a ton. She has had an unaccountable crush on Element Lad, even though he’s very much spoken for, since the day when he asked her whether she’d rather lift a ton of feathers or a ton of steel.
SSA LASS. From the 30th century version of Washington, DC, she has the uncanny ability to bring senior citizens their Social Security checks on time. Her apparently limited powers proved invaluable in that one backup story where the capital of the United Planets– and Colossal Boy’s mom– faced certain death from a mob of laser-wielding oldsters upset about 30th century postal delays.
TACK CAT. Her feline features suggest a kinship with Timber Wolf, or perhaps a charter membership in the prestigious Legion of Super-Pets, but her power set– at least initially– had nothing in common with either. Instead this pointy-eared, whiskered would-be Legionnaire from the planet Offissupliis (given name Meao) could strew the field of combat or fill the air with flying tacks. Ouch! After Sun Boy told her that her powers were kind of dumb, she asked Nura Nal to use magic to change her abilities, just as Nura had with Ayla Ranzz: now Meao is hyperalert, hypersensitive, and always sharp as a tack.
She had the rare distinction of what looks like a romance with Chlorophyll Kid, though that subplot took place during his attempt to cross Earth-based with Valtraxian catnip, it was never clear from Jim Shooter’s writing whether he was her boyfriend, her annoyingly persistent suitor or her dealer. Levitz and subsequent writers wisely decided not to revisit that particular pairing, having her date feline non-Legionnaires instead.
LAP PAL. An actual Super-Pet who later took temporary humanoid form, Lap Pal had big floppy ears and an unusual number of toes. She could render antagonists harmless, and even peaceful, by refusing to leave their lap.
ORORO. Not the famous X-Man designed by Dave Cockrum, but another of Cockrum’s little-known Legion designs, whose presence explains Storm’s otherwise baffling name (Swahili for “soft,” “delicate” or “smooth”). She is, in fact, very smooth.
NEET TEEN. Perhaps the most confusing palindromic hero, Neet Teen began in the Silver Age in an effort to reach older teen readers who had taken an interest in cosmetic and self-care products: she exuded a depilatory chemical that could confuse and distract the opponents whom she also rendered hairless. She once defeated the Emerald Empress by removing all her cherished hair at one blow, thus stunning her for long enough that Karate Kid could knock her out while Saturn Girl telepathically disabled the Empress’s eyeball.
During the Threeboot era it became clear to DC editorial staff that millennials had no idea what Neet was or had been, and that modern teens no longer used depilatory creams. The same editorial team hoped to make DC readers out of young people who consumed anime, manga and other international media. As a result, Neet Teen’s powers were changed to reflect the acronym NEET (Not in Education, Employment or Training), applied by social scientists and journalists to young people who had become shut-ins, all-day-and-night gamers, or otherwise refused to grow up and turn into “productive” “members” of “society.” This incarnation of Neet Teen (real name: Halb Blah) had the power to spread millennial anomie, rendering opponents twitchy, sad, listless and generally ill-suited to confrontation. In a recurring subplot, Brainac Five tries to fix or rehabilitate her, while she insists that she’s just fine.
YO BOLO BOY. Yo Bolo Boy throws bolos. Words of “o”– no otros– sop or cool Yo Bolo Boy’s moods. Yo Bolo Boy coos. Yo Bolo Boy bops cons. Yo Bolo Boy won’t stop, tho cons go “oh no!” Yo Bolo Boy knows how to stow pogs, bolos, socks… Oops– Yo Bolo Boy boofed! Yo Bolo Boy knows Ororo is pogs. Yo Bolo Boy mows down fops. Go, Yo Bolo Boy! Go! [Inspired by this: https://www.poetryinvoice.com/poems/chapter-i]
SCIF’IFICS. This fan favorite reality warper joined the Legion when her populous homeworld A’othri emerged from its historical hidden status into a provisional membership in United Planets: despite her vast powers, she’s uncertain where she belongs. Often joyful and flirty, sometimes angsty, eager to over-share, she can open portals to non-canonical worlds, rewrite events that end unhappily, and sometimes read teammates’ feelings. In the long arc that introduced her (concluding with the famous issue 434– it rules) she learned to use her powers to build space ships. Scif’ifics can also defend herself in close quarters with the ancient weapon of her homeworld, the rectangular K/S blade, used only to slash, since it has no consistent point.
DROLL LORD. Originally a villain, Droll Lord switched sides when he realized that he could practice his low-key humor and his set of Anglophile in-jokes in peace if he would only agree to work alongside his onetime young rivals. Almost no one else believes he’s funny.
LELOL-EL. This particular Kryptonian refugee gained immortality from their exposure to polka-dot kryptonite, and has spent the last 900 years mostly making memes. Only Droll Lord thinks they’re funny. But they keep trying. LOL.
Stephanie Burt is Professor of English at Harvard. Her podcast about superhero role playing games is Team-Up Moves, with Fiona Hopkins; her latest book of poems is We Are Mermaids. Her nose still hurts from that thing with the gate.
