A Spooktacular Leftover Horror Anthology Roundup for Your Halloween Reading Pleasure

When the dang sign says “take one,” don’t be a dick. Also, don’t hire a demon for your kid’s birthday party entertainment in Creepshow #1. “Take One” is written and drawn by Chris Burnham, colored by Adriano Lucas and lettered by Pat Brosseau. “Shingo” is written by Paul Dini and Stephen Langford, drawn by John McCrea, colored by Mike Spicer and lettered by Pat Brosseau. Published by Image-Skybound.

Your marriage isn’t going to fix itself in the woods, especially when you’re about to be murdered, and don’t believe your magic haunted house is always going to be on your side in Shock Shop #1. “Something in the Woods, In the Dark” is written by Cullen Bunn, drawn by Danny Luckert and lettered by Nate Piekos. “Familiars” is written by Bunn, drawn by Leila Leiz and lettered by Piekos. Published by Dark Horse.

The internet is filled with creepy weirdos, and you drew the one who’s here to kill your family. Congratulations! Afterschool #3 is written by Jill Blotevogel, with layouts by Marley Zarcone and Lisa Sterle, art by Sterle, colored by Fabiana Mascolo, lettered by Pat Brosseau and published by Image-Skybound.

Will Nevin: It’s almost Halloween, Ian! And instead of grabbing the second issue of Sweetie Candy Vigilante (which is not out, but roll with it — it’s a bit), I’ve got us three spooktasty anthology books because, goddamnit it, I love a good anthology series. Two of these are brand new (to us) because ET-ER is apparently just a series of one-shots (which is confusing as fuck), and I do believe if I went with another issue of NewThink, you just may have shivved me.

Ian Gregory: Correct.

Will: Are you a horror fan? What do you like best about the genre, and why do you think it so often pops up in these anthology series?

Ian: I do like horror, and I’m partial to body horror. As with all body horror fans, I’m partial to the works of Mr. Cronenberg, but I get most of my fix through manga. When it comes to American comics, I don’t think there’s any doubt that Lonnie Nadler and Zac Thompson have body horror down to an art form (thinking in particular of I Breathed a Body or Come Into Me). I look less to be scared and more to be grossed out.

Will: In this house/column/collection of cooking tips and food miscellany, we stan body horror!

Creepshow #1: A Movie, Then a Comic, Now a Comic and a TV Show?

Will: A few fun facts about the original Creepshow: The movie came *first* and was written by Stephen King and starred (among others) Leslie Nielsen, Ed Harris, Ted Danson and King himself (in a role that I thought he totally fucked up, because in the comic adaptation that followed the movie, the short he starred in was the most haunting fucking thing). Did you have any exposure to the original?

Ian: I must again plead my youth, because you could have told me this was an original property and I would have believed you. I guess there’s a new Creepshow miniseries, but I don’t watch television so I’ve totally missed that as well.

Will: Look the movie up; it’s worth watching. And the comic ain’t so bad either. But in this here issue we’ve got two standalone stories, with one handled by writer/artist Chris Burnham and the other from writing duo Paul Dini and Stephen Langford. I’m not quite sure which I liked best — Burnham’s “Take One” had some odd dialogue choices, but it fit the classic horror anthology profile and looked sharp, while Dini and Langford’s “Shingo” was fun but probably not quite what I want in something like Creepshow. Which story scratched your horror itch more?

Ian: I feel like these horror anthologies can’t give up their 1950s moralism. At the very least, “Take One” is so removed from any sort of actual topical moral dilemma it reads like a fun throwback, but there’s no satisfaction to be had in poorly behaving teens being punished. It’s gruesome, but in a fairly predictable way, with eyeballs popping out of their sockets and bog-standard disembowelment. Once you’ve seen a man explode into a mass of cancerous tumors (Cronenberg warning), the lesser forms of gore and violence really slide off you. “Shingo” I thought leaned into the horror-moral mismatch much more heavily, and as a result was a more enjoyable read even if it wasn’t particularly gross or scary. Some of the little jokes, like the kids googling 11th century demonological manuscripts, were pretty well done.

Will: I really did like Burnham’s art. If you’re going to do a horror comic, give me details and viscera, baby. I want to be physically ill while I’m reading your sick shit.

Ian: The chocolate bar vomit was pretty good, and I read it while eating a tuna sandwich so it hit pretty hard. I may have criticized the type of gore, but you’re right that Burnham is doing good work on “Take One.”

Will: After reading Dark Night: A True Batman Story, I tend to think the worst of Dini’s work in that it may or may not evidence some misogyny. Did anything in that story give you weird vibes?

Ian: There’s a vague gesture at judging Fiona, the birthday girl from “Shingo,” for emotionally manipulating her parents into buying her a bunch of birthday gifts, but all I can say is: based. Her parents suck, they fought at her party and brought a demon that ate all the guests. I say she’s entitled to some birthday pampering.

Will: Ian, who among us hasn’t hired a child-eating demon for a kid’s birthday party? You shouldn’t be so quick to judge.

Shock Shop #1: A Choppy Chop Stop

Will: I think my first (maybe only?) complaint about this book is the structure. Unlike Creepshow, we’re not told that there are two stories in this issue, and we have no way of knowing that until the first stops midway through the book, after which we’re given another introduction from our narrator/master of ceremonies and thrown into the second story. If you ask me, it’s a messy way to structure your series, and I’m not thrilled about a serialized anthology. My tiny brain can only remember so much from month to month.

Ian: I do have a lot of thoughts about this. It seems like every horror anthology needs its own Crypt Keeper to play mascot and give ominous and vague introductions to each story. Do you actually like these pages? I pretty much always end up skimming them, because they never say anything of value about the story and aren’t really as clever as they think they are.

Will: It’s another medium, sure, but Rod Serling played the part well in The Twilight Zone, and his omniscient narrator gave everything some amount of cohesion, which is at least one reason why you need this type of character. You need some kind of emcee, but — and since you mentioned him — they all feel derivative after the Crypt Keeper. While we didn’t read its best, Grimm Tales of Terror handles the idea pretty nicely with its malevolent sprite/pin-up gal.

Ian: I also agree about the split-book; each story gets just enough time to get interesting before ending, and I’m worried that dividing each issue into two parts like this will give both choppy, frustrating pacing.

Will: If I had to pick a favorite here, it’s “Familiars,” the story of a haunted house that is perhaps not as fun as it appears to be. It gets the nod over “Something in the Woods, In the Dark” because 1) I don’t need any more failing marriage stories and 2) that final splash page was tight as hell. Which one did you like most?

Ian: Definitely “Familiars,” for both the reasons you stated (although, this isn’t a “failing marriage” story but a “failed marriage” story) and one more: I like a character with a good relationship with their kids. It’s much more tragic to imagine this guy, who just tries to provide a good time for his children (OK, and maybe get one up on his ex) suffering some sort of supernatural consequence, and I’ve gotten tired of all these horror stories inflicting justified revenge on their characters. Give me a protagonist I can root for, even if I know they’re doomed. I didn’t mind “Something in the Woods, In the Dark,” except that it was vaguely like The Ritual, a great flick but one that filled all my needs in terms of “monsters in woods.”

Will: As far as the art goes, I again preferred the second story over the first. Something about “… In the Dark” just felt off to me, like there was detail in some places (like hands) but not enough in the spots that needed it (like faces).

Ian: I love the red-washed panels in “Familiars” to indicate something odd occurring. The bright colors and expressive art definitely set up a great contrast for that final splash page.

Afterschool #3: Family Comes First (After Not Dying, That’s Probably First and Super Important)

Will: For me, this was the Freshest Chicken of the Week, the issue that captured the spirit of the horror anthology and gave us the best lesson at the end. What did you think of this one as a whole?

Ian: Curious that this is your pick, as it is the only comic this week without a mascot narrator! Proving my point, I think. I agree that this was the best issue this week, even if it isn’t very “horrific.” It just felt like the most complete single story.

Will: It was a bit of a slow start — older sister complaining about babysitting duties and whatnot — but once it got into Home Alone/slasher mode, I thought it was pretty successful as a book. It’s relatable, right? Familial obligations can be exhausting, and there’s always an internet weirdo willing to lend a sympathetic ear to whatever troubles a pretty young lass may have.

Ian: The turn to slasher violence is seemingly out of nowhere, but I felt like the killer had a fairly complete (if totally deranged) motivation. He was scary in a way that is comprehensible; he sees himself as a benevolent liberator and is utterly charming when not wearing the mask. All of the tricks used to beat him are well set up, as was Izzy’s deep intelligence. Like all stories in this series, I felt like the creators were getting at something more meaningful than standard revenge-porn horror violence fare.

Will: You’re right about the sort of elevated purpose here — I think all of the creators on this series have been motivated to tell a personal or important story, which usually makes for good work. (Unless we’re talking about Dark Knight: A True Batman Story.) This is an incredibly minor point, but what was the very last panel all about? I couldn’t figure out why the hell a helicopter would be involved there.

Ian: I figured it was either a police helicopter or, based on the kind of panels at the bottom of the page (which suggest a videocamera’s frame), a news copter.

Will: Also — and this is another minor point — do you know what Image was teasing in both Creepshow and Afterschool with those black-and-white pages? I guess I could google it, but that sounds like work.

Ian: Nah. Maybe if you put them all together it makes a single story?

Will: *thinking emoji*

Does This Smell OK?

Sound Effects Watch: In Afterschool, as the killer is axing down the closet doors, the breaks between panels are marked with “THUK!” effects. It makes a nice, rhythmic division between the boy’s frantic actions inside the closet as the killer gets closer and closer.
Rapid fire questions:
- What’s your favorite King work?
  - Will: Gotta be The Stand. Baby, can you dig your man?
  - Ian: I’m honestly not sure I’ve read any Stephen King that’s really stuck with me, except maybe “Jerusalem’s Lot,” but that was ages ago. I’ve seen Lawnmower Man II, though!
- What’s your toughest breakup?
  - Will: Divorces aside, I’ll have to go with Laura in high school. We were in an acting class together. That was messy as hell.
  - Ian: Too recent to talk about.
    - Will: 🙁
- What’s your Rube Goldbergian plot to stop a home invader?
  - Will: Lego. Lego all over the goddamned house.
  - Ian: I’ve got an angry cat with no self-preservation instinct, so I think I’ll let her handle it.
Casserole of the Week: Freida’s Five Can Casserole. I never knew who Freida was, but her messy slop of canned chicken (1), cream of chicken soup (2), chicken noodle soup (3), evaporated milk (4) and chow mein noodles (5) is good eating. Pro tip: Don’t sub in sweetened condensed milk. You’re not going to have a good time.
Got Diwali leftovers? Here’s what you can cook up with them.
Someone was asking for a non-alcoholic bourbon-flavored edition of Dr Pepper, but it certainly wasn’t me.
Trying to protect leftover pizza in the fridge from unauthorized raiders? Try dousing it in ghost pepper flakes.