In a perfect world, X-Force wouldn’t be necessary. Unfortunately, we aren’t so lucky. The team tries to perform another autopsy without their Omega Level mutant, because their last one went soooo well. Oops, now they have to deal with little skinless Russian gremlins everywhere. Will Beast or Piotr ever learn to feel remorse? Will Quentin ever stop dying? We sure hope not! Ben Percy, Bazaldua, and Guru-eFX bring us X-Force #11.
Ari Bard: Well Kenneth, a new home wouldn’t be complete without a pest control problem.
Kenneth Laster: Tell me about it! Roaches are Out! Russian Nesting Corpses are In! These little things are some nasty boys and sadly there is also a large nasty boy by the name of Piotr Rasputin who would be the worst if Beast was not also here. Also a sword! Beefy issue with a beefy boy! Let’s hop in!
Russian Doll Season 2 Took A Turn…
AB: As we’re hopping in, a bunch of skinless miscreants are hopping out of… themselves?
KL: It’s nasty! I’ll say it! I think it’s a new nightmare I will have. Welcome to the rotation! These guys are another one of Percy’s ideas that I love and hate at the same time. Much like Reverse Domino, where the idea is really interesting, I feel like there’s something missing in execution. Maybe because the design ends up just being red and wet or that there’s not a necessarily creative way to dispatch them other than switching from X-Force’s old friend, guns, to X-Force’s time-honored acquaintance, explosions. I do have to say I don’t fully remember where these guys came from. The dialogue mentions the corpses were a Marauders/Wolverine collab and the last time the Marauders went up against Russia in their title, Logan wasn’t there so I wasn’t sure if this was in Wolverine which I’m not reading. [Ed. note: Cannot emphasis enough how you specifically need to be reading that Kenneth] Did you have any insight into this Ari?
AB: I definitely understand where you’re coming from Kenneth. I feel very mixed about these little rascals as well. I’m mostly just unsure of the tone Percy is trying to create here. I feel like Percy is trying to establish credible and dangerous threats to Krakoa, but I couldn’t help but find most of this issue to be outright hilarious. The X-Men are trying to battle these slippery skinless fellas all over the island, but it comes across more like a Scooby Doo chase montage.
As far as where these guys are coming from, there’s a big subplot occurring across multiple books about Russia and their response to Krakoa as a whole, to their own mutant population, and to the distribution of the Krakoan flowers. The bulk of it takes place in Marauders, but the Krakoan flower trade has led to a drug trafficking issue that’s largely been investigated and dealt with in Wolverine. I actually love how these books are intertwined, but after going back and rereading, it doesn’t alway give more context to certain events like these skinless guys. I’m not sure everything makes a whole lot more sense now that I know a bit more about what they’re related to. Nonetheless, there’s potential there and I’m excited to see how tiny they can get and where they’ll be popping up.
KL: Interesting! I am definitely into how much the books are crossing over and that this was tied to a Wolverine issue. I shouldn’t be that surprised since Percy is writing both but still. These little mfers running around are interesting because they are yet another in a long line of enemy’s with interesting gimmicks running around in the X-Force book and I’m not sure if it’s the pandemic schedule or if I’m losing track because there are just…a bunch! I think I’m definitely here for the characters in the book at this point and Percy has delivered on that front but I can’t help to think about that guy with the Peacock tattoo, and then I think there was a mysterious stranger…Unless that was tied into whomstever shows up at the end? Which might be getting ahead of ourselves. Any other thoughts?
AB: There are definitely a lot of moving parts here, especially on the antagonist side, and I am interested in seeing how Percy is able to revisit and connect them all. I’m worried some of these guys might get lost in the weeds… literally. Nevertheless, despite some tonal inconsistencies and whether they are intentional or not, the book continues to be great fun. That is, except for when it comes to one particular shiny, problematic man. Would you do the honors Kenneth?
Big Boy Season Is Cancelled
KL: THIS big idiot is back…Colossus has returned and he’s so big still! I know it’s Bazaldua’s artistic interpretation but goodness even in human form Piotr is a unit! Also he’s on a farm with some pink lady who is suspicious as hell and is once again the worst! I am getting a sense that Percy is definitely going somewhere with Piotr and his many flaws, especially with the women in his life. It can’t be a coincidence that his farm lady friend looks like a half-remembered version of his Secret Wars lover. I am really getting a sense that there’s something more going on there.
AB: May I just say, what a MASSIVE DOOFUS. Every time this man appears I am taken aback by how swole he continues to be, and I cannot roll my eyes hard enough at anything he says. I am excited to break things down and discuss piece by piece how terrible this man is, but as for the lady friend standing next to him, Zsaji is a good and interesting theory that would seem to track. [Ed. note: At minimum we’re supposed to be reminded of her.]
That being said, I know nothing about most of Marvel canon, I’m armed with two pieces of information, and have the power of google, so I’m going to present another theory to stir up some drama. This woman is referred to by Piotr as “Kayla” and appears to have some powers of influence or manipulation. You know who else is named Kayla and appears to have some powers of influence or manipulation? Silver Fox. I’m done now. You can go ahead Kenneth.
KL: Powers of manipulation aside, Piotr is exemplifying textbook f-word boy behavior. Domino gets blown off by Colossus and his new boo with a ‘tude in this Savage Land Cottage-core domestic life and then Piotr runs back to throw one large object before mumbling “There is nothing to thank me for” and moping away. This man is too shiny to be so messy! I’m torn because I’m interested in the s-word show that Colossus is creating for himself but I would be a little bummed if his horrifying mass pulls Domino into his gravitational pull. I think they have an interesting dynamic but I think she’s got way more going on for Colossus just being a s-wordy guy to take up her page count. I suppose this is an X-title so there is most definitely something more going on with powers and mystery but I worry.
AB: Kenneth, I’m not sure I could have put it better myself. Piotr is an absolute disaster, and he deserves all of it. Bury this man into the ground. I am worried that Percy is digging him to a hole miles deep only to launch him back out of it later in the run, but as long as that doesn’t happen and Colossus has to confront his behavior, I’ll be happy. This man is literally like, “Oh woe is me for what I endured when I had to rescue refugees from persecution in Russia.” What about oh, I don’t know, the refugees? No care in the world for them I guess. I will definitely be upset if I have to watch this guy manipulate and sleep with another woman, and Domino is way better than that. That being said, the man is big enough to have his own gravitational field, so she better watch out. You’re right, Kenneth, that this is an X-title so powers and mystery come with the territory, but you know what else comes with the territory? Airheads causing problems for everyone else, and speaking of airheads, there’s another furry one we have yet to touch on.
KL: Hank McCoy himself yes yes. It’s definitely hard, storytelling wise, with characters like Beast and Colossus where they aren’t “villains” but far from “good, morally sound” people so there’s definitely a loop of minor redemption arcs but their flaws end up kinda getting reset so another team can play with. I’ve definitely read less comics with Colossus being taken to task than I have Beast, but I think Hank’s consistent return to “mad scientist with iffy ethics” is less of a difficult pill to swallow than Colossus being redeemed and reset as a guy who is emotionally manipulative to women.
Definitely curious to see if this leads to a conscious effort to address issues dating back to Claremont, which arguably could be easier to pretend never happened. But the attempt to address it could be something potentially very interesting especially considering gestures at the men in comics. Could be something but I am not getting my hopes too high…Anyway #SWORDWATCH!
I Of Swords
KL: Sword Watch 2020! Ari we have a sword! Specifically the sword of Cerebro stolen by one of those little nasties and given to *Googles* Mikhail Rasputin! Ari what are your thoughts on Colossus’s brother with the least distinctive costume in comics?
AB: Oh, thanks for saving me the Google. Yeah, I don’t know much about this guy, but he definitely seems like Colossus’s brother. I’m glad that the team really eased us into the sword idea by having these little gremlins run around with knives first. It presented a natural evolution to one of the most powerful swords ever created (probably) that I really appreciate. Also, like, how does this man know that exists? That would mean they’re connected to the assassin strikeforce team that killed Xavier in the first place right? And they’re connected to the peacock man. We need a corkboard and some string Kenneth. Dots are being connected.
KL: I too know nothing about Mikhail, and skimming his Wikipedia page gives me a headache but I think it is interesting his appearance along with the gross nasty Russian nesting dolls and the Chronicler data pages, so I do agree with dots being connected and much like the real world…it all leads back to a Russian man in a grey onesie and a cape.
AB: I’m excited to see what the man has in store and what’s with that weird mosaic scar/tattoo on his face, so I’m definitely looking forward to learning more, and continue to watch Quentin Quire die in different ways over and over again. It’s definitely an official challenge at this point.
X-Traneous Thoughts
- Kenneth’s Sound Effect Corner: Skelch, Russl (almost my middle name!), and Splorch Thanks VC’s Joe Caramanga!
- Quentin dies again RIP
- Also wild that Phoebe is fooling around with Quire!
- He led to Sophie dying back at Riot at Xavier’s (tbh there’s probably continuity where they made up) [Ed. note: the opposite actually]
- Is #Teen Cable dating all of the Cuckoos?
- What about Gwenpool??
- Anyway got a text from Hickman saying that I’m spoiling next summers crossover, “Cuckoo War” so I gotta dip–
- Krakoan reads: Mother Russia
Ari Bard is a huge comic fan studying Mechanical Engineering so he can finally figure out how the Batmobile works.
Kenneth Laster is a critic, cartoonist, and cryptid with a movie degree.
