This weekend we will get another peek at Matt Reeveâs much anticipatedâand much delayedâfilm, The Batman. The franchise reboot (which is now scheduled for March 2022) has been the source of endless speculation and discourse online, and while everyone seems genuinely excited for the film, I feel it is my duty to point out one glaring casting issue.
No, itâs not Zoe Kravitzâs Catwoman. Or Jeffrey Wrightâs James Gordon or Paul Danoâs Riddler. My issue is that these actors seem born to play these roles. And if that is the bar we now set for superhero films, then thereâs only one comic book character that Robert Pattinson can truly embody. And that character isnât Bruce Wayne. Itâs Gambit.
Now Iâm not saying that Robert Pattinson should play Gambit. I donât even want Robert Pattinson to play Gambit. All Iâm saying is that Robert Pattinson is the only living actor capable of fully embodying the role of Gambit. Heâs been method-acting the part for most of his life and the guy doesnât even believe in method acting. Donât believe me? Letâs review the facts:
10. Theyâre not afraid to take fashion risks
Neither Pattison or Gambit are scared of exploring self-expression through their closet. Theyâre not preoccupied with âtrendsâ or âthings that look good.â The mystery as to whether they got dressed in the dark or spent hours meticulously picking that outfit is part of their questionable charm. Which brings us to our next pointâŚ
9. No one really understands why women love them
Listen, I get it. I really do. The sex appeal is as confounding as it is undeniable. Remy looks like he smells like a crayon. Pattinson says he actually smells like a crayon. But no matter what either does (or smells like), they never seem to alienate their ardent fans. But donât ask me to explain it, okay? Like, do you think I have any idea why both of these men are so attractive even though every rational cell in my body tells me they absolutely should not be? Because I donât. Iâm not a psychologist. Just drop it already. Moving on…Â
8. Neither has a good grasp on accents or realizes why that is bad
Remyâs linguistic heritage is a loosely defined amalgamation that changes with whatever writer is helming his character. Is he Cajun? French? Southern? Itâs a mystery. But thatâs why Pattinson is perfect. Because with Pattinson you could get all of it. At once. Seriously, just imagine RPatzâs attempt at a Southern accent in The Devil All The Time and then the French accent he used in The King but at the SAME TIME. Itâs perfect.Â
7. Neither has seen much character development in the past 20 years
Look at how Pattinson described himself in 2019: âIn a lot of ways I havenât developed past 15.â Now look at Gambit.
6. They are not particularly good at relationships and/or break-ups
Gambit left his ex-wife in a coma only to have her wake up and dedicate herself to destroying his life through a series of coordinated attacks and assassination attempts. Pattinson dumped FKA Twigs which inspired the entire Magdalene album. So like, same.Â
5. They both embody chaotic himbo energy
Letâs be honest, neither Pattinson nor Remy come across as a Rhodes scholar. But that alone does not a himbo make. A well-rounded himbo needs a hint of sadness in their persona, something that adds a pathetic tinge to their simplicity. And while Iâm not sure Remy has the self-awareness to examine this, Pattinson was succinct enough here for the both of them: âI had a stalker while filming a movie in Spain last year. She stood outside of my apartment every day for weeks â all day every day. I was so bored and lonely that I went out and had dinner with her. I just complained about everything in my life and she never came back.” So simple. So pure.
4. Theyâre both very good at lying
Yes, Remy is a member of the Thieves Guild who lied for years about his possible involvement with the massacre of hundreds of innocent mutants, but has he ever gone on national television and made up an entire story about witnessing a clownâs violent death at a circus? âHis little car exploded,â Pattinson solemnly told the Today Show in 2011. âThe joke car exploded on him.â Remy only wishes.
3. Their hair
WTF is even going on here, respectively
2. Theyâre both not sure where they fit
Listen, Gambit has never exactly been embraced by the broader X-Men clan. Or his family. Or even on occasion his now-wife. But being an outsider is something Pattinson knows something about. Or thinks he knows. Maybe. And thatâs why Remy can relate. âSomething I thought I could use as a good description of myself: thereâs, like, a dog in an elevator,â Pattinson said in 2019. âAnd every time the doors open thereâs this whole new world, and it just canât figure out whatâs going on. Thatâs, like, every day for me.â Yes. Exactly.
1. Pattinson would love playing Remy
There is no question that while any cinematic depiction of Remy LeBeau will be an absolute train wreck, that is exactly why Pattinson is perfect for it. As he told The Guardian in 2019: âI like characters who, when a situation is placed upon them, their decision-making process is incomprehensible. I find it fascinating when people make bad decisions.â See? Itâs meant to be.
Emily Harding is a television producer and writer whose work has appeared on numerous networks and sites, including History, MTV.com, Bravo, and Discovery.
